Tuesday, August 16, 2011

Woman, Why Weepest Thou?


This picture is hanging on my bedroom door and I see it each time I enter or leave my room.  I have always loved the story the picture tells.  Christ died and then was resurrected but Mary hadn’t learned of his resurrection yet.  She finds the empty sepulchre and assuming the worst, she’s filled with great anguish.  Certainly she loved and believed Christ, and was mourning the loss of a great friend, but maybe there was more than that.    Maybe she was filled with doubt.  No one had been resurrected before.   Maybe she doubted her faith in Him; maybe she was beginning to think He was gone forever.  While she’s grieving, Christ comes to her and asks, “Woman, why weepest thou?”

These simple words have been echoing in my head all day.  Mary was mourning because she missed her friend and because she was filled with doubts about the promises Christ had made.  Maybe her plans and expectations weren’t happening like she’d imagined.  Whatever the case, Mary was heartbroken and the Savior asked, “Woman, why weepest thou?”  

Like Mary, I am also heartbroken.  I am mourning the loss of a great friend and relationship.  I am doubting the promises Christ has made to me and it appears my plans and expectations aren’t the same as the plans the Savior has for me.   For the past year, I’ve had hopes and dreams and have envisioned a not-too-distant future that will never come to pass.  And it’s in this moment of my heartbreak that I can almost hear my Savior say, “Woman, why weepest thou?”

Though this relationship may have ended, Christ’s promises to me are still real and I need to trust Him.  One day, I will be blessed with my greatest desire… to be a wife and mother; to have a family of my own to watch after and love.  That day just may not be as soon as I had anticipated.  So for now, I’m going to try and let go of my doubt and fears and  trust the words of my Savior and His love, because He will never lead me astray ; and if I give my hands and my heart over to Him, He will heal my pain.