I Don't Want to Forget...

This Christmas season went by in a flash!  There were so many sweet moments that I don’t want to forget. I wish I had beautiful photographs to document them all, but honestly I’m not that skilled at capturing great moments.  

Even though I don’t have a picture, I don’t want to forget crawling across the parking lot of my apartment to get to my car because the wind was blowing so hard (55 mph, baby) and the parking lot was a sheet of ice.  

I don’t want to forget all the people that were praying Christmas Eve morning that the weather would cooperate long enough for me to get home.

I don’t want to forget the tear that trickled down my face on the airplane as I saw the Salt Lake temple and I realized I really made it home.

 I don’t want to forget that my dad picked me up from the airport in his 1988 Mazda blaring the 100 hours of Christmas on the radio.  

I don’t want to forget singing and dancing to “Last Christmas” with Camille and Cheyenne as we made Roulden.  

I don’t want to forget the way my mom’s voice cracked when she thanked God that our family could be together when praying over our Christmas Eve dinner.  

I don’t want to forget my dad reading the Christmas Story from the bible and the way we all curled up in our living room and sang Christmas carols.

I don’t want to forget the spontaneous Christmas Eve wrestling match that broke out between all six kids and dad when my mom stepped out of the room and the way my dad hopped back up on the couch and acted all innocent as soon as she re-appeared.

I don’t want to forget telling stories that made me laugh so hard I couldn’t breathe.

 I don’t want to forget that we had to wait until 7:31 to open presents, because 7:30 just wasn’t good enough.   

I don’t want to forget randomly bursting out into the “Do you want to build a snowman?” song.

I don’t want to forget the feeling of baby Maggie curled up in my arms.

I don’t want to forget the taste of coconut hot cocoa.

I don’t want to forget the spectacular lights of Temple Square.

I don’t want to forget that I actually finished a game of Mexican train.

I don’t want to forget waiting FOREVER to get a burger at Training Table, but being okay, because they have coloring pages.

I don’t want to forget the craziness of playing spoons and the bruises that now dot my arms.

I don’t want to forget all the familiar faces, well wishes, and hugs I found when visiting my old ward.

I don’t want to forget that it took multiple attempts to fit EVERYTHING back into my luggage.

I don’t want to forget the way my dad hugged me so tight,  I wasn’t sure he was gonna let go, and the way mom’s chin quivered and her eyes filled with tears when she said, “Come back soon” as they dropped me back off at the airport.

Yes, this was a Christmas I don’t want to forget.

A Cold, Snowy Lesson

Well, the inevitable happened.  I’ve experienced my first big Wyoming snow storm.  Don’t get me wrong, I’m not a snow hater… It’s beautiful and I love building snowmen, getting in a decent snowball fight, and sledding; but I am NOT a fan of the cold and I dread driving in the snow. 

     I’ve had this not-so-secret hope that while I’m in Casper, the winter will be incredibly mild and we would only get little snow flurries… but after a foot of fell last night, I realized that’s not going to happen.

    And although I am not a fan of all this snow and the cold, I am so grateful for a little reminder it brought to me today.   You see, because this storm was so early in the fall and the trees haven’t yet lost their leaves; a lot of trees crumbled under the pressure--- taking the power lines with them.  So besides it being freezing and slippery outside, a lot of the city is without power.

     I hadn’t realized the degree of the situation (my apartment had power and seeing how I’m working at the hospital… we had power too) until a few hours into work.  You see, around 10 I began getting calls and texts and they’ve continued throughout the day.  While the wording has changed a bit from person to person, the message is the same.  Knowing that I live alone and my closest family is 300 miles away; several members of my ward family have reached out to check on me and make sure I’m safe and warm.  And before knowing I had power; many offered me a warm place to spend the night.  With each call and text, my heart was touched, and I was again reminded of the beauty of the gospel.

     The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints is a church that believes in reaching out and helping each other, and today I was reminded of this.  While I am safe and warm (don’t worry mom)…. Things could have easily been different.  And it is so comforting to know, that if I ran into trouble I have an army of people waiting to help.  So, although I’m not a fan of this cold, wet weather and I’ll be spending my entire weekend holed up in my apartment (there’s a restriction on driving right now); I am grateful for the reminder that came from the falling snow.  Even with my closest family hundreds of miles away, I am not alone--- I have an entire ward family here in Casper that I belong to--- and I am so grateful for them!

My Home Away From Home

I did it!  I survived my first week in Casper.  And with my first week over, I have so many things I could talk about.  I could talk about my SWEET job; or about all of the texts, calls, and e-mails I got this week that melted my heart; or about the super awkward and ridiculous date I went on.  But, I’m still learning the ropes at the job, and if I wrote about all the sweet words I received I totally would tear up, and my date story is SO much more fun to tell (at one point, he did use the phrase, "I'm going to have to rebuke you" on me) than write.  So, today, in honor of my first week in Casper, I dedicate this blog to my new apartment.

The outside of my very own apartment

Here it is, apartment #427.  I know it’s not the fancy apartment I told y’all about a month ago.  But, after the housing fiasco of 2013, I was thrilled when this place opened up.  It’s bigger than my other apartment would’ve been, it’s cheaper (like $300 a month cheaper) AND it’s in a safer neighborhood… so I feel very blessed to have found it.  Shall we look around?

Giant Living Room... Great for Dance Parties

     Welcome to my living room!  Isn’t it spacious?  Since I’ve only lived in furnished places before my move, I have had a bit of a problem… no furniture.  I thought about making a nice sofa or loveseat out of all of my moving boxes… but was informed that would be too white trash, even for Wyoming.  So, until I break down and buy some furniture or complete residency and move elsewhere, my living room is nothing more than a pretty big empty room.  Except  for….

One of my very favorite pictures of Christ!  I love this picture because I think it captures the Savior and His love so perfectly.  He’s so welcoming and inviting, and I love having this picture as a constant reminder of how I want to live my life.

 And, don't fret, when I have company over, and they don’t want to sit the floor---- I can pull my chairs away from the table.

My Very Beautiful Living Room Furniture

     Big empty living room problem… solved!

     After walking through my living room, you’ll stumble upon my kitchen.  

Notice the dishwasher, toaster, and crockpot... all musts!

I quickly learned having a small microwave does have it flaws.  Like being unable to put more than a small plate inside.

 

                                                                                                                                                       

Isn’t it lovely?  I do love my little kitchen, and in fact, I may call it adorable.  It’s got everything I really need to cook to survive and I feel so domestic when I put on an apron and make dinner in here.

When you step out of my kitchen, you’ll run into this…

My Dining Room

My dining room.  As you may notice, my phone is on the table and that is no oversight!  Dinner has always been a very social thing for me.  I’ve always eaten dinner in company--- whether with family, roommates, or a date--- I just don’t eat dinner alone.  So coming home and eating by myself has been hard!  After the third day of eating in silence, I had an epiphany, and now, when dinner time rolls around …. I call up someone, put them on speaker phone, and eat.  It’s made dinner so much more enjoyable. (My apologies if you ever hear my chewing).

The really neat thing about my dining room is it’s very flexible and often times it’s converted into….

A study nook.  The rumors about residency are true, it is A LOT of work.  See that giant stack of papers, that’s my reading assignments for 1 week!  AND while being a busy resident, I’m also studying for this little test called the NAPLEX (keep your fingers crossed and good vibes headed my direction on July 26^th when I finally take the test).  I’m just glad I have this sweet office to do all my studying in.

Once you leave my dining room/office area you run into a long hallway.

Long, creepy at night when the lights are off and I can't see a thing, hallway

On the right there are 2 bedrooms, the left has a storage room and a bathroom/laundry room and straight ahead is a linen closet.  Would you like to see them in more detail?

The Guest Room

First, is what I call my guest room.  I thought about making it into an office, but decided against it, in case I ever do find a roommate.  So, for now it will be my guest room for anyone who wants to come visit (hint, hint).  Just bring along a nice sleeping bag and you’ll be good to go. ;)

Across from the guest room is my bathroom/laundry room.

Love having a bathroom all to myself

On the left is the shower, the right in the door that opens up to the laundry room

I am so excited to finally have a bathroom all to myself.  I feel so grown up and independent.  The style of the bathroom is a little weird though… As you can see it’s very long because the washer-dryer hook-ups are in a closet within the bathroom.  Of course, I don’t have a washer and dryer so this has just become a place to throw all my dirty laundry and collect quarters for my trips to the Laundromat.

Laundry Room... Notice the Rolls of Quarters :)

Stepping outside of the bathroom/laundry room combo you’ll run into my bedroom.  I’ve hesitated showing pictures of my room because, as I’ve been told, “It’s classy.  And not in a good way.”  But here you go, my bedroom.

The plan was for me to move down here, and then buy a bed frame and a big girl bed instead of the twin sized bed I’ve been sleeping in forever.  But, here’s the catch… I’m cheap and stubborn… a bad combination.

Super Classy Bed (Please mom, don't shake your head.... I really like it)

I bought an air mattress to get me through the first few days, until I could buy furniture and have it delivered, and  in the process found that I liked the air mattress.  Like, a lot.  It’s like camping (which I’ve always loved) except for in a warm house with a bathroom right across the hallway (so it’s like really cool camping).  And since I’m cheap (why BUY furniture when my contact expires in a year anyway?) and stubborn (once I like an idea there’s no turning back)… it looks like the air mattress is here to stay awhile.  I promise I’m super comfortable and it’s a lot worse looking than it really is.

Other than my super classy bed, I also moved my computer and office stuff into my room.  I’ll admit, it looks pretty cluttered which is driving me nuts, so I may get a desk…. But I like having all my office stuff so readily available, especially when it’s dinner time and I need in to go somewhere.

My cluttered office area.... I really may break down and get a desk

And, if you look just across from the cluttered office area, you'll notice this hanging above my bed.

Love these guys.  And their random phone calls and texts.

  

I love this picture and I love that it's one of the first things I see in the morning, and one of the last things I see when going to bed.  My family is my world… and although we may be a state away, they will always be a big part of my life.

So, that's the grand tour.  Did you like it?  I know it's not lavish ... but I love it.  I've only been here a week and this place has already become a place of much prayer, faith, laughter, and love and I'm so excited to spend the next year here.

Misconceptions

     I’ve been living with a misconception for a while now.  I’ve had it in my head if something is right, and it’s what I’m supposed to be doing, then things will go smoothly and I’ll have no problems. 

     Case and point: Residency.  For the last year or so, I’ve had a very strong and distinct impression that I needed to complete a residency, and I struggled with this impression for a while.  Mainly because it would require a move (I love it here and I had a pretty sweet job offer) and it also felt like I was chasing after a career, when, in reality, I really wanted to chase after a family instead.  But, alas, I followed the impression… applied for residencies, interviewed across the country, and then matched with the University of Wyoming.

     ‘Why’-Oming was the last place I thought I would end up.  And I’ve asked ‘Why’ countless times.  I’m not a fan of the cold, or snow, or cowboys (I’m the biggest sucker for a clean-cut boy… none of this rugged junk), and to be totally honest, I thought I would end up in either Vegas or Phoenix where the LDS YSA population is bigger.  I figured; residency was going to be the way for me to get out of my shell, and socialize with more young single adults.  But instead, I’m going to a place where my dating pool just got incredibly smaller.

     So, I prayed, and prayed, and prayed to know that Wyoming is where I needed to be and, ya know what, I once again got this very distinct feeling that it was.  And that Heavenly Father KNEW I wasn’t thrilled about it, He KNEW I was scared to move out to the middle of nowhere by myself, and He KNEW I was terrified that I was making a big mistake… that I was somehow choosing a career path over a path to have a family.  And ya know what else, I got a very strong re-assurance that I wasn’t making a mistake at all, and that all of the things that my heart really, really, really desired would come to pass.

     After getting this amazing re-assurance after the match, I thought things would get easier.  Because, I was doing what Heavenly Father wanted me to do.   But, things haven’t been easier and I’ve hit some major bumps in the road.

     Becoming a licensed pharmacist has become quite the paperwork nightmare and is taking MUCH longer than I was initially told.  (Fingers crossed, I’ll be licensed by July 1^st).    But even more stressful than that, has been the nightmare of finding a place to live.  Because, there’s NO housing available in Casper. 

     I’ve been looking since I matched at the end of March, and only found a place to live this past weekend.  I considered finding that place a miracle, and then early this afternoon, I felt like my miracle had been ripped out from underneath me, when I received a phone call informing me I could no longer move into my apartment until July 9^th, even though residency starts July 1^st.    

     After hanging up with my apartment manager, I maturely locked myself in the bathroom and broke down. ( I’ll blame the borderline hysteria on being sick from donating blood yesterday.) My poor family tried to console me through the bathroom door, but I just didn’t want to hear it.  I’d prayed for a housing miracle for months, and felt like it had been taken from me.  I was questioning my move to Wyoming, and to be totally honest, I wanted to back out and take the job offer I had here.  I love Utah.  I love my family.  I love my ward.  I love all the people that I serve and interact with on a daily basis.  And taking a pharmacist job here wouldn’t be all bad.

     Eventually, my family left the house, and I finally had time to think things through and pull myself out of my ridiculous hysteria (seriously, ridiculous).    And while I was pondering, and praying, the thought hit me.  That things don’t always work out perfectly, even when you’re doing the right thing.  This afternoon, Nephi’s story just kept coming back to me.  He was commanded to get the plates from Laban and go to the promised land.  And he did.  But it didn’t go off without a hitch.  If he would’ve given up at the first sign of trouble (because he’d been carrying around the same misconception I had… that if God really wanted him to do it, there would be no problems)… he would have never made it to the promised land.   

     And so, I’m gonna be like Nephi, I’m still going to do what I’m supposed to, even though things are less than perfect.  I’m still going to Wyoming.  I don’t understand why.  And I’m terrified.  And once again I’ll be homeless for the first half-of the month.  But, it’s okay.  Because Heavenly Father knows more than I do.  And He thinks moving to Wyoming is a fabulous idea.  And since He can see the end from the beginning, I’m going to trust Him… even though things aren’t perfect.